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Dear journal,

I really don’t think it’s fair at all. I can’t even think about it without being sick. Just because I’m a girl I get in trouble. Why doesn’t my mom understand?

It started this morning when I was at the table having breakfast. Mom yelled at me for sitting with my knees bent and my feet pulled up on the chair. This is the only way I am comfortable sitting! All during breakfast mom tried to explain how it was vulgar or something. I started crying and ran up to my room. I couldn’t help it, she was being so mean and pig-headed. She just doesn’t understand.

I waited until she went in to her room and then grabbed Seth and ran out the door without saying goodbye. I just wanted to get away from the house and from her and her stupid rule. But I was still upset and I bet I looked awful when we got to Sunday school. I didn’t even want to go in the first place. It just isn’t fair.

Then, in class, we were talking about temptation–the same thing we always talk about. All the boys had their feet up on the little table in the middle of the room so I put mine up too. I didn’t think anything of it, especially since mom wasn’t there to judge me. But after class I went to the bathroom before church started and mom came and found me. “You are in trouble young lady!” she yelled. But then she wouldn’t tell me why.

So all through church I kept on looking at her, waiting for an explanation. Finally, as we were getting ready to leave she said, “It really upsets me to hear Billy Rowlett talk about looking up my daughter’s skirt and seeing her underwear.” I felt like I was going to throw up. Billy was sitting right across from me in class!

When I got home Jeff called and I didn’t want to talk to him. He is a boy and all boys are gross. He and Billy and all the rest of them. And mom got mad at me, like I did something wrong. I just locked my door and wouldn’t come out all afternoon. Dad came upstairs looking for Seth but I didn’t know where he was. He probably went to Mr. Shane’s house or something. I said I watched him leave on the bike. Dad asked me to go look for him but I refused to leave my room. I guess they found him because he just knocked on my door to come in and tell me something. I didn’t open it. I don’t care right now.

I wish the world wasn’t so perverted. It isn’t fair that I can’t sit how I want. I don’t think I’m ever going to wear a skirt again. And I’m definitely not ever going back to Sunday school.

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