James had never known what to do with the video. Until now.

Just minutes ago the boy upstairs had volunteered to record the award show for him. This was the boy James heard all afternoon and night. When he showered and sang. Or when his boyfriend visited and the two made a lot of noise. The boy who had moved in 7 months ago with a smile. James realized that this would be the only chance to show his creation. He crossed his fingers and rewound the tape.

“Thank you so much taping this for me. I can’t believe I have to work tonight.”

“No problem,” said the boy. “I owe you anyway.”

“I already rewound the tape. I’m not sure what’s on it, but it doesn’t matter. Tonight’s show should top anything else.”

“Who is hosting again?”

“Who cares! This is a our solemn duty: The Oscars. We have to watch…it’s in our genes.”

“Whatever. You are crazy. it’s like you read some book on how to be gay and are just following the directions.”

“Thanks again, puddin’. I’ll stop by tomorrow to pick up the tape.”

What if he doesn’t play the tape before he records the show? No…he has to watch it. He’s too curious. Maybe he’ll even rewind it and play it again.

What James had left for the boy upstairs was the only pornographic video he had in his collection that he had made himself. And it featured James as the sole (solo) actor. A 3 minute and 22 second recording of himself playing with himself. He skipped to work expecting the best upon his return. I am happy to say he was disappointed. Although, at the same time, I am not exactly sure what his goal was. Seduction? Did he think I would watch it and ask him to see the real thing? Did I mention he was 37 years old at the time? Chunky and divorced from a woman?

I’m curious what happened to James. He disappeared completely after his refrigerator caught my upstairs apartment on fire, but not before he got his tape back from me.